PSYCHOTHERAPY

&

COUPLES COUNSELING

with humor and compassion

 

 

MICHAEL Z. JODY L.P., M.A., M.A.

 

 Licensed Psychoanalyst

 

For Individuals & Couples

 

Anxiety, Depression, Career Issues, Creative Issues,

Couples/Marriage/Partner Counseling,

Relationship Problems, Sexual Problems

 

By Appointment Only

 

(917) 825-8565

 

REASONABLE RATES, SLIDING SCALE FEES,

 INSURANCE ACCEPTED

 

Two offices:

 

MANHATTAN:

156 5th Avenue (20th Street)

Suite 534

New York, NY 10010

AMAGANSETT LONG ISLAND:  

Harold McMahon Medical Center, 

530 Montauk Highway

Suite 201D

Amagansett, New York 11930

 

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Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart.  Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakens.

CARL JUNG (1875-1961)

 

 

HOW DOES TALK THERAPY WORK?

There is a writers’ saying: “How can I know what I think until I see what I say?”  This is called shaping at the point of utterance.  The same principle applies powerfully to psychotherapy.  Sometimes you don’t know what you really feel until you begin exploring and unpacking your thinking.  Discussing your thoughts, feelings, emotions, conflicts and problems with another person can be of great help.  If that person is caring, professionally trained, smart, sensitive and objective, then talking with that person and exploring your difficulties and concerns can be illuminating, and of tremendous assistance. 

 

Airing your thinking aloud with a professional, focused, compassionate second ear, can help you to unpack your emotions, rethink chronic problems and worries, and live more consciously.  It can give you clarity and allow you to see your problems and issues in a new light.  The next time you find yourself depressed; anxious; creatively blocked; in conflict with your mate, family or children; engaging in an unhealthy behavior like reaching for a drink, fattening food, or a drug, you may be better able to comprehend why you are driven to do so, and make conscious some of the connections that were previously unconscious.  What happened to trigger the feeling or behavior?  Why did it happen then?  And most important: must it always proceed like that or can you do something to prevent such harmful or unproductive behaviors from recurring? 

 

Self-awareness and understanding are the necessary first steps to turning injurious behaviors around.  Real change can only follow self-knowledge and self-understanding.  And it is such genuine change that finally allows you to free yourself from chronic problems and live your life more consciously and with greater pleasure and freedom. 

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A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers.

ROBERT QUILLEN (1887-1948)

 

HOW DOES COUPLES COUNSELING WORK?

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The aim of couples counseling is to improve communication and increase understanding between partners.  As with individual talk therapy, when thoughts and feelings are brought into the light, ventilated and examined honestly, calmly and openly, then each member of the couple will be better heard, understood, sympathized with and respected.  From such enhanced understanding comes increased acceptance, tolerance and forbearance.  When partners understand each other, they are better able to forgive, accept, appreciate, and ultimately love one another. 

 

No relationship will ever be without its struggles, wrangles, and disputes.  However, there are two basic kinds of fight or conflict in any marriage or relationship: unconstructive conflict and constructive conflict.  In unconstructive conflict, people fight, get hurt and angry, say things they later regret, and possibly even escalate into actions that damage each other or the relationship.  Constructive conflict, on the other hand, is where differences of opinion are honestly examined, and a new level of understanding and compromise is arrived at. 

 

How can you tell the difference between the two kinds of conflict?  Simple.  After an unconstructive conflict, both parties tend to feel worse, and nothing has been positively addressed or changed.  On the other hand, after a constructive conflict, the issue has been resolved or at least improved, and both parties feel better.  

 

The main job of the marriage counselor is to provide a safe and protected space where each partner will feel safe, supported and assisted in making her or his thoughts, feelings and needs known and understood.  Each member of the couple should feel secure, respected, heard, and understood.  And each should be able to speak freely from the heart without being afraid or feeling negatively judged. 

 

As one of my patients once said, “I speak in Ellie and he hears me in Matt.”  (Don’t worry, I changed the names.)  A counselor may act as interpreter, clarifier, mediator, translator, and intermediary.  Counseling can help couples out of recurrent fights and seemingly irresolvable issues, it can allow partners to move on after an affair, and it can help you to really hear and see one another.  Marriage counseling can help and succeed at every stage of a relationship, beginning, middle and even at the end where a divorce mediation process may save a great deal of pain, heartache, anger, and even some attorney’s fees. 

_________________________________________________

A good listener helps us overhear ourselves.
Yahia Lababidi (b. 1973)

 

Amagansett (Thursday, Friday, Saturday & Monday)

Harold McMahon Medical Center

530 Montauk Highway

Suite 201D

Amagansett, New York 11930

New York City (Tuesday & Wednesday)

156 Fifth Avenue (@20th Street)

Suite 534

New York, NY 10010

MAILING ADDRESS:

Michael Z. Jody

P.O. Box 1260

Amagansett, NY 11930-1260

QUESTIONS? 

Please feel free to call (917) 825-8565

or email me at:

 

TherapyCounseling@yahoo.com

 

 

QUALIFICATIONS, AFFILIATIONS, & MEMBERSHIPS:

New York State Licensed Psychoanalyst (L.P.) 
M.A.:    University of Michigan
M.A.:    New York University
Member:    The American Counseling Association (ACA)
Member:    The International Association of Marriage and Family Counselors (IAMFC)
Member:    Division 39 of the American Psychological Association (Div39/APA)
Associate Member:    National Association for the Advancement of Psychoanalysis (NAAP)

Helpful Online Resources & Information

 

NY State Education Dept., Office of the Professions Online Verification:  http://www.op.nysed.gov/opsearches.htm 
The American Psychiatric Association:  http://www.thebody.com/apa/apapage.html
The History of Psychology:  http://psychclassics.yorku.ca/index.htm
National Psychological Association for Psychoanalysis:  http://www.npap.org
Couples Counseling (Marriage Counseling, Partner Counseling) Information & Resources:  http://couplecounseling.biz
American Psychoanalytic Association:   http://www.apsa.org/index.htm
New York Psychoanalytic Institute and Society:  http://www.psychoanalysis.org
A Guide to Clinical Psychology and its Practice:   http://www.guidetopsychology.com
American Foundation for Suicide Prevention:  http://www.afsp.org/index.cfm?fuseaction=home.viewPage&page_id=1
Suicide Prevention/Information:  http://www.helpguide.org/mental/suicide_prevention.htm
Psychotherapy Defined:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychotherapy
Depression.com:  http://www.depression.com/
Couples Counseling:  http://TherapyCounseling.org

 

 

© 2009 Michael Z. Jody

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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© 2009 Michael Z. Jody